" He Who is Afraid of Asking is Afraid of Learning... " ~ (Danish Proverb)

Re-visiting 2012

You might ask why the title of this blog states that we are “re-visiting” 2012 since it’s only 1/2 over! As I embarked on reviewing my midpoint budget and financials, I decided that this would be the best time to look back at our year thus far, review any words of wisdom we gave ourselves circa December 31, 2011 and how those words have measured up to reality.

My year got off to a slow start and with a renewed purpose to understand and refine my own limits of productivity. I vowed to “give myself a break instead of pushing forward aimlessly” and believed in the hypothesis that if I sought “clarity”, then my task list would magically prioritize itself. So, I studied the different facets of productivity and its underlying catalysts personalty type, motivation, planning, and eventually found myself back exactly where I began with a now-tested-hypothesis-turned-proven-theory about just what productivity really means (Hint: it did indeed involve slowing down and allowing my goals to drive my efforts) .

And, just how did I do that?…

  • Slowing down has not been easy task and the operative word here is task. I’ve forced myself to carve out quiet time and turn off the email, blogs, twitter and phone if only for minutes or hours. I have to prioritize silence, rest, and de-clutter my mind . This is akin to inviting a marathon runner to a tai-chi class. Torture!
  • I also have to be willing to try the unknown - experience things that make me uncomfortable in order to find those which I would enjoy.
  • I am loosening my attachment to pre-defined goals and allowing the goals to define themselves as the year progresses. After 6 months of hitting my head against a wall trying to force myself into the goals I thought I needed to achieve, I began to revisit those goals, accept that I was unmotivated to achieve them for a reason, and wait for the right ones to replace them. Not surprisingly, my goal list is far smaller today than it was then, and the two goals I do have are ones which I feel open to accomplishing.
  • And although last on this list, it should really be first since it drove all the others – I continue to pause until clarity arrives. Over and over and over again. Note, I did not say STOP. I merely pause, step away from the goal, do something to distract myself and clear the space the [wrong] goal is taking up in my head. This is NOT easy to do, without guilt or the drive to just do something, but it is necessary. In fact, clarity has become one of my top three words for 2012. The other two may make celebrity guest appearances in future blog posts.

So, it may take me longer to get where I need to go and my internal GPS is still mapping out the correct routes; but that is OK as long I do not allow self-doubt to drain the fuel in my car; and I believe that when I get there, I’ll know that it’s exactly where I should be.

Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

Wishing You Success,
N
atalya

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