ConGraduations on your Graduation !!! Navigating the Maze of Life’s Choices, One Generation at a Time…

‘Tis the season for graduations, congraduations and the like. Having avoided my own ceremonies and attending only by force , I have a tremendous appreciation and admiration for the generations today which I am witnessing embrace this rite of passage.

In particular, I was fortunate to be part of a wonderful family event honoring two of my cousins recently, one of whom is graduating onto University and the other to High School. Needless to say, aside from the sheer pride etched on their parents’ faces, there were also the lines of devotion and sacrifice embedded deeply. Watching my two cousins, I wondered: How is it that this generation seems so focused? So open to opportunity? So acclimated to the opulence of options they have, and so comfortable with change?

And, in thinking, I was able to arrive at two answers (there are sure to be many more, but these are my deductions):

1. Despite the plethora of choices they have, they really have no other choice: We have all heard it said over and over again: This is not your parents’ world. Life is tough. The economy is tighter than a rubber band that has already snapped. So, these kids, knowing the world in which they have grown up and are now entering as “adults”, ACCEPT that they must stand on their own and know who they are. Yes, life will be harder for them. They will have to fight harder for their success and they surely better know what they want at the end before they even begin. And, no, they cannot Google the answers to these questions nor can they Blackberry message their friends to ask them either. These answers lie not only within themselves but also around them, in the fiercer than ever competition they face among their very own peers. So, in a sense, that which might overwhelm them in the face of limitless possibility and abundant resources is what must keep them most focused.

2. There is simply no room for “life envy”: Coined by Nietzsche, the term ‘Lebensneid’ translates into “life envy” – i.e., the certainty that someone else is much luckier than you.*

If only you had his/her…spouse, life, six-pack-abs, corner office (you see where this can go…), then YOUR LIFE would be so much better. Yet, in my own experience, “life envy” does not occur because you are an inherently discontent or lazy person wishing for someone else’s good will; rather, it rather ironically occurs because you are a focused, hard working, ambitious individual who is simply overwhelmed by the many choices life presents to you and the inability to feel secure that the choices you make are the correct ones. I recall praying directly to God to please let me be accepted to only one University of the six to which I’d applied. If only one accepted me, that made my choice so much easier didn’t it? There would have to be no choice….this example is microcosmic compared to the many life choices we are faced with daily, even hourly.

Thus, you can begin to grasp why the modern world has become – even with all of its advances and advantages – a neurosis generating machine. In a world of such abundant possibility, so many of us become limp with indecision.

~Elizabeth Gilbert, excerpted from Committed, Penguin Books, 2010 *

Having so many options can make us stressful, anxious and plagued by the risk of missed opportunities. If you choose ‘A’, you relinquish ‘B’. Life has room for only so many options. And, today’s generation, on some level, realizes this. They’re neither terrified by all the choices nor that they may choose the wrong one. They inherently realize that to stop to over-examine the many choices they have will paralyze them. To try to compare themselves with their peers or wonder if they should have chosen someone else’s path instead will waste their own time and prevent them from ever seeing, far less reaching, their ultimate goals.

Are YOU decisive? Is your decision-making ability frozen by the amount of mind-numbing choices which surround us?

Perhaps we have to stop questioning ourselves and instead listen to the answers which are right before us and all around us. Create our own model lives and navigate our way through life using our internal GPS.

Wishing You Success,
Natalya

** If you enjoyed this post, you may also enjoy:

1. CHOICE – Life’s Most Frequent Activity
2. Paradise Lost…Opportunity Gained?